Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

We have not said anything to them, and they have not said anything to us about it. It's from a family friend of DH. Any suggestions??

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

can you play dumb and innocently call and ask them
if they mailed you a wrong check?
maybe they wrote a different one out for you? etc....
if they ask why you can say it bounced
maybe they will send you a new one

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

You should tell them because they may not know yet, and they'll get charged for the bounce....and so will you. This happened to us and we said something because we were at their wedding 2 weeks before our own, and gave a gift, so this was really a surprise and we figured a huge mistake. We also couldn't re-deposit it because of bank rules.

They never replaced it (even after telling us they were sorry and it was a huge mistake)...we don't plan on sending a thank you.

Message edited 8/18/2003 2:12:35 PM.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

We had a bounced check also. Just redeposit it. If it bounces again just chalk it up as a lost cause. I personally wouldn't say anything to them though.

For the thank you I'd just thank them for attending your special day : ).

Good luck!!

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

Do not reference anything about the check in the TY, I think you should call them and let them know, if they keep on top of their account they should know the check bounced b/c they got a charge. Call and ask them when you should re-deposit. They should be kind enough and even offer to pay for any fees incurred. One of our guest wrote a check from her old a/c and it bounced and she reimbursed us with a new check and fees included.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

I had a bounced check...and they called me right away (the had an identity problem issue - and immediately sent a chasiers check)


I probably wouldn't say anything, b/c they will find out from their bank...and then they should do the right thing...otherwise it seems that you are calling and asking for your gift...

If they still hadn't said anything...i would just thank them for attending the wedding

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

I didn't have any bounced checks but I would call and say something. I would think since they have not said anything they don't realize the check bounced.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

Definitely call them because it's obvious they ddin't do it on purpose. My mom gave a check at a wedding in March and they just deposited them and her check bounced because she had closed that account a couple months ago thinking all checks were cleared. So definitely call!

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

Uhhh, thank you for the bank fees???

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

I am in the same spot. Dh's friend and his wife gave us a check that bounced. I am in the process of writing out TY's and keep putting theirs on the side. I really have no idea what to say to them. I was thinking just thanking them for being there...but I feel wierd saying just that. We never said anything to them and they never said anything to us...so, I just said forget it and dropped it. But the kicker is they just bought a new house and they wil be having a GTG. Do I dare show up with no gift...or should I just not go? It really bothers me that they never came clean about the check. I had to pay a bounce fee with my bank, so I know they did too. It's not the money, just the fact that they never said anything. Sorry...I took over your post to vent.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

Thank you all for your advice. I don't know if we can tell them. Both FH and I avoid controversy and awkward situations at all costs!! They must know, though. A wedding gift is a lot of money to be put back into your account. Maybe you wouldn't notice it if the $10 check you wrote bounced and got redeposited, but a few hundred dollars would definitely not go un-noticed. It is totally NOT the fact that we lost a gift from them, but just be mature about it and say something to us. But then again, I suppose the same could be said about DH and I for not saying anything! Their father was invited too, and came without a gift. Maybe it runs in the family.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

I get so ****ed at stuff like this.

My MIL said that since we should be getting a thank you card from them soon for our wedding gift to them, we should send one back with the bounced check where the picture would go, and just write "you're welcome" in it.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

OH! I forgot the best part! They won the centerpiece, which was $125 each! So at the end of the evening they conceivably walked away $25 richer!!

Mistyeyed

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

as much as you would want to say something to them...I would take the higher road...and just thank them for coming...I think it is almost impossible for them not to realize what has happened (the bank will mail you something to your house) and if you show your maturity...maybe it will make them feel bad and rectify the situation

in the end...did you want the person there for the gift...or for their presense to share your day...

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

Yabbobay, you are right. We did not invite them for the gift they would give. My original question was actually about just what to write on the Thank You. I am just going to thank them for coming and sharing our day with them. But then my concern is that it will make them feel awkward. I am sure it was not deliberate, so I almost feel that I should still say thanks for the gift because they INTENDED to give one and it's the thought that counts. But, I think I'll just say thanks for coming.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

I had a similiar situation, I called them, I redeposited the check it bounced, I called them again, they assured me the money was there, it bounced again. In the end it ended up costing me money because I got charge $20 from the bank. When I saw the charge I hit the roof and called the bank and told them to take it off. How dare they charge ME, for someone elses money problems! They ended up crediting me back only $10.

I did not send them a Thank You.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

I had a bouncer, I re deprosted it twice too, i chalked it up as a loss!

No TY was sent, but thats just me!

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

I would say Thank You for spending our special day with us on the TY card.
But I would call and let them know that you are not sure if they are aware but their check was unable to be cashed and you thought that they might need to know. Many people do not balance their checkbooks or even keep good financial records so don't assume they know yet. Don't ask if they will send a new one or anything, just let them know and accept the apology that they say on the phone. Then if they say please redeposit the check, then you can. If they don't say anything about replacement, then just drop the whole matter.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

This happened to us and we called them. (a friend of my husband's). He sent us another one.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

NANJO: I'm sure you got something you could re-gift from your wedding.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

In my thank you, I'd say thank you for coming, hope you had a wonderful time, thank you for the gift. And I wouldn't mention that it bounced. They will know. If they want to send you another check, they will. You don't want to embarass them. If they don't send you another gift, oh well. Like you said, you invited them because you wanted them there, not because you wanted their gift.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

Nora....LOL!!! Don't think I wasn't thinking that!!!

I am just going to kindly decline the invite for thier GTG.
I am sending them a thank you...just saying thanks for being with us on our special day.

Re: Bounced gift check - What to write on Thank-You??

We had one check that bounced out of all of your gifts. I guess the person resubmitted the check and it went through. Nothing was ever said about it!