BM issue

FH and i asked a couple we're friends with to be in the BP. we were apprehensive at first because they were somewhat new as friends, but we had grown really close to them, so we wanted them to be part of it.

some tension has unfolded between us. it's a bit complicated to explain--an awkward dynamic over the last few months with a 3rd couple who hangs out a lot too, and a few glaring situations where they were rude to us & made us uncomfortable. my BM and i talked about this i guess about 2 1/2 weeks ago, and since then i've been getting the blow off.

i'm content to go our separate ways if need be, but there's this lingering question mark of what do i do about the BM commitment. do i have to "kick her out?" does it count as kicking someone out if you think they might not want to do it either? holy awkwardness!

Re: BM issue

I would talk to the girl you have the issue with and see whats going on. I know it doesnt folllow the "proper etiquette" but if you dont feel comfortable having her in it, I would kick her out.

Re: BM issue

Aww, I'm sorry you're faced with this! I had a BM that I was pretty sure wasn't interested in being involved. I would try to assess her level interest in the whole thing, which was hard since she'd blow me off all the time. Eventually I just told her that it'd be best if she weren't in the BP and it'll be easier for her and for everyone. She put up the fake fight ("Oh, no! but I really wanted to be involved" and "Are you sure you really don't want me to be a part of your special day?" but I knew in my heart that I didn't want it and neither did she. We went our separate ways, she's no longer a BM and we both feel fine about it.
GOOD LUCK! I know this is definitely a tough one.

Re: BM issue

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Posted by Future Pepper

Aww, I'm sorry you're faced with this! I had a BM that I was pretty sure wasn't interested in being involved. I would try to assess her level interest in the whole thing, which was hard since she'd blow me off all the time. Eventually I just told her that it'd be best if she weren't in the BP and it'll be easier for her and for everyone. She put up the fake fight ("Oh, no! but I really wanted to be involved" and "Are you sure you really don't want me to be a part of your special day?" but I knew in my heart that I didn't want it and neither did she. We went our separate ways, she's no longer a BM and we both feel fine about it.
GOOD LUCK! I know this is definitely a tough one.

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