| Posted By |
Message |
jtgarsik
CrAzY 'BoUt tHe HubBy :)
Member since 11/05 8070 total posts
Wedding Date:
12/1/2006 5:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Jericho Terrace
|
LOL..
stole this from the newlywed board - this CRACKED me up! lol. i KNOW u can probably all relate!
MAN vs. WOMAN
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long robe. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower. Use wash cloth, long loofah,
wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs.
Rinse off.
Turn off shower.
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
Return to bedroom wearing long robe and towel on head.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom.
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits.
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
Pee.
Rinse off and get out of shower.
Partially dry off.
Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
Admire wiener size in mirror again.
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, and light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and
make the woo-woo sound again.
Throw wet towel on bed.
If there is anyone who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you.
Have a great day..... and woo woo!!!
|
Posted 1/27/08 12:54 PM 
|
| |
|
Jen2999
What's next?!
Member since 11/04 9849 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/7/2006 4:00 PM
Wed. Location:
CHATEAU LA MER--AMAZING!
|
Re: LOL..
love it!!!
|
|
Posted 1/27/08 1:41 PM
|
| |
|
jtgarsik
CrAzY 'BoUt tHe HubBy :)
Member since 11/05 8070 total posts
Wedding Date:
12/1/2006 5:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Jericho Terrace
|
Re: LOL..
Posted by Jen2999
love it!!!
lol isn't it hysterical?!?!! cracked me up! 
|
|
Posted 1/27/08 3:36 PM
|
| |
|
ewickens
We have a PUPPY!!!
Member since 1/05 13582 total posts
Wedding Date:
9/16/2006 10:30 AM
Wed. Location:
Brentwood Country Club A++
|
Re: LOL..
Hilarious!!!!!!!!
|
|
Posted 1/27/08 9:12 PM
|
| |
|
evnme
Aloha!
Member since 6/05 9523 total posts
Wedding Date:
5/21/2006 4:00 PM
Wed. Location:
|
Re: LOL..
|
|
Posted 1/27/08 9:52 PM
|
| |
|
cindyandkevin
Queen of the Boards!
Member since 2/05 21575 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/10/2006 5:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Stonebridge Country Club
|
Re: LOL..
"Woo-woo!"
|
|
Posted 1/28/08 11:08 AM
|
| |
|
Jennie0898
saving bee bees since 2005
Member since 5/05 3076 total posts
Wedding Date:
9/23/2006 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
YES. you ARE a BEE BEE
|
Re: LOL..
sad but true...
this is my life.
|
|
Posted 1/28/08 11:46 PM
|
| |
|
Potentially Related Topics:
Currently 5397 users on the NYCityWeddings.com Chat
|
