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becca888
Board Enthusiast
Member since 3/06 96 total posts
Wedding Date: 8/8/2008 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
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Engagement Gift Question - personal?
Hi girls, I don't know if this is a sensitive issue.
I was wondering if your parents or FIL's gave you and FH a gift for your engagement. One friend's parents are making a party as their "gift". My cousin said each set of parents bought them something for their home (no e-party). Another friend said no gift, their contribution to the wedding cost is their gift.
I was hoping for an e-party, and was going to tell our parents that could be their gift to us, but maybe they weren't planning on a gift at all? We got engaged a month ago, my parents had FIL's over for dinner and we celebrated with champagne. We're not a big family that usually throws big parties.
Should I bring it up? Should FH and I plan a party and pay for it ourselves? First bridge to cross!
TIA!
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Posted 3/16/06 4:56 PM
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spring06bride
Board Fanatic

Member since 11/05 513 total posts
Wedding Date: 3/25/2006 5:00 PM
Wed. Location: Hamlet Wind Watch
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
depends. I think if you wanted to throw an engagement party for yourselves, then do it without the expectation of your parents offering to help you out. If and when they do, you'll be pleasantly surprised!
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Posted 3/16/06 4:59 PM
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becca888
Board Enthusiast
Member since 3/06 96 total posts
Wedding Date: 8/8/2008 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
Thanks, good suggestion!
Seems like most brides on the board have engagement parties, and I wondered if it's ok to host our own!
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Posted 3/16/06 8:43 PM
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MsKitty1274
My little Monster!!

Member since 7/04 3537 total posts
Wedding Date: 6/25/2006 2:00 PM
Wed. Location: Jericho Terrace
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
We paid for our e-party, and our parents (all 4, seeing as both sets are divorced) gave us gifts. All monitary, all different amounts.
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Posted 3/16/06 8:49 PM
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Meaghan729
"I'm Addicted"
Member since 1/06 2457 total posts
Wedding Date: 7/29/2007 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
FH's family is very against engagement gifts and engagement parties. They said they are saving the gifts until the wedding.
I personally don't like formal E-parties, but if you want one, I would throw it yourself. we are planning to have a family bbq in the summer, so the families can meet. my family gave us E-gifts, mostly small monetary gifts or things for the wedding (cake topper, etc).
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Posted 3/16/06 8:53 PM
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bride2b24
~Married and loving it!~

Member since 12/05 4400 total posts
Wedding Date: 7/28/2007 3:00 PM
Wed. Location: Leonards of Great Neck
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
i think every family's situation is different.....my mom is contributing to our eparty as for FILs we'll see....
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Posted 3/16/06 9:11 PM
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Boop2704
It's A Sickness!
Member since 3/03 6050 total posts
Wedding Date: 2/7/2004 3:00 PM
Wed. Location: Stuart Thomas Manor A+++++++
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
My mom paid for our e-party..heck she was so excited I got engaged she planned the whole thing too...that was our engagement gift from her and my father in law gave us a cash gift. My parents are divorced and my dad and stepmom took us out to dinner and gave us a cash gift. Its still early, you've only been engaged for a month, maybe they haven't thought of it yet, maybe mention in conversation with your parents that you and FH are thinking of having an engagement party, maybe they will offer to host it, and do the same with FH's parents, mention it and feel them out. Congratulations on your engagement!!
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Posted 3/16/06 9:28 PM
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lisad117
I'm a Mrs.
Member since 2/05 1342 total posts
Wedding Date: 5/19/2006 5:00 PM
Wed. Location: Chateau La Mer- Amazing, Amazing, Amazing!!
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
My parents gave us an engagement gift, his mother didn't even send a card but I think it might have been because FH was married before. I didn't want a party but if we had one we probably would have thrown it for ourselves.
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Posted 3/16/06 10:12 PM
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BJandDan
Happily Married :)

Member since 6/05 4574 total posts
Wedding Date: 7/1/2006 11:30 AM
Wed. Location: Westbury Manor- A+++
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
Nope, nothing. We through a get together for our parents to meet afterwards. My father did cook the steak, does that count?
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Posted 3/16/06 10:14 PM
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glinda_goodwitch
I married my best friend...

Member since 3/05 8735 total posts
Wedding Date: 6/17/2006 5:30 PM
Wed. Location: Jericho Terrace
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
We didn't have an e-party. My FILs gave us a card and a generous monetary gift, and my parents took us out for a nice dinner.
Have your parents met yet? It might be nice to have a small gathering, not so much an e-party but a get together for the families to meet. You could bring it up that way and see what they say.
Message edited 3/16/2006 10:17:29 PM.
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Posted 3/16/06 10:16 PM
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Soon2BeMrsS
Board Dutchess

Member since 6/05 5286 total posts
Wedding Date: 11/11/2011 4:30 PM
Wed. Location: Where we celebrate forever
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
Posted by spring06bride
depends. I think if you wanted to throw an engagement party for yourselves, then do it without the expectation of your parents offering to help you out. If and when they do, you'll be pleasantly surprised!
I was going to suggest the same thing
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Posted 3/16/06 10:37 PM
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stlmn2u
We're Married!!!

Member since 2/06 1881 total posts
Wedding Date: 5/4/2008 5:00 PM
Wed. Location: A Place Fit for a Princess!!!
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
My future in laws didn't give a gift nor did they give us a card....Not one of them....But as for my parents....My mom bought us our toasting flutes, paid for our engagement announcements, bought us a coffee pot and our cake serving set for the wedding.....
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Posted 3/16/06 10:49 PM
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becca888
Board Enthusiast
Member since 3/06 96 total posts
Wedding Date: 8/8/2008 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
Thanks ladies, you're suggestions are helpful. We already did the dinner get-together, so I think we will just suggest that we want to make a small party and take it from there. I just don't want to spend alot of $$ as we are saving for our "share" of the wedding.
I think a house party would be great if one of our mom's is willing!
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Posted 3/16/06 10:59 PM
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becca888
Board Enthusiast
Member since 3/06 96 total posts
Wedding Date: 8/8/2008 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
People have mentioned toasting flutes, cake toppers, cake cutting sets, etc. Do the halls supply these and people just buy them as keepsakes? I'm new at this
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Posted 3/17/06 12:13 AM
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EmberLynn
Keeping it real!

Member since 11/03 3446 total posts
Wedding Date: 10/6/2006 2:00 PM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Engagement Gift Question - personal?
My FH and I thrown our selves an e-party. Mainly because our parents NEVER met. My mom and dad gave joe and I money to pay for the e-party so I didn't expect anything from them. But his parents gave us a gift.
Message edited 3/17/2006 12:56:03 AM.
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Posted 3/17/06 12:55 AM
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