falling behind & depressed-rant

just venting but i'm so behind in planning. Getting married in october 06. work is going absolutely crazy and mom has some recent health issues so I have gotten very little done. I barely have time to do basic personal hygiene! sheesh ...All i have booked is reception hall & church. I had booked a band as well but this weekend they called to tell me the singer I wanted is not available. great. i also just started talking to photogs but they are such primadonnas and i'm having a hard time scheduling appts. I haven't finalized my wedding party and i haven't visited any stores for dresses (although i've picked a bunch of styles i liked based on extensive online searching done at 3am which is my only free time). i can't even go bridal gown shopping yet cuz my mom is bedridden for a month more. I'm gonna end up with some off the rack used sample gown.

anyone else like me out there? i'm screwed aren't i?

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

my wed is july 29th 2006 and I still have a lot to do. Don't wory you still have time! Once you get the ball rolling it all comes together!

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

Nope-you can still get it done. Maybe try to plan a day where you meet with 3 vendors and make a decision. We can certainly help you narrow it down if you tell us what you are looking for and what budget.

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

dont stress. i took the advice of another LIW bride (one of my date twins!) when I felt the same way. i went out and bought a big board and every month i have a list of things that HAVE to be done before the month is over. i find it much easier this way. i also keep a spreadsheet with a checklist so i don't feel as overwhelmed. FM me if you want me to email you the template.

as far as vendors go, try going to a bridal expo where you'll find everything you need under one roof. this time of year, they are going on all over the place! and with your dress, who cares if its off the rack or custom made as long as you look stunning! chin up, you'll get it all done eventually!!!

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

thanks for the encouragement ladies. i def need it right now.

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

don't stress...I am getting married 6/23/06 and did almost everythingin the past month...yo will be fine, you just have to be organized about it. HTH!!

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

First off lots of

Listen I got ingaged in August of 05 and I am gettign marreid in May 06, so we only gave ourselves 9 months to plan the wedding, and we were still able to get all the vendors we wanted, sure it takes a little extra leg work, but you are not too far behind. I know that at times it can seem all so overwhelmin just thinking about all that you have to do. If you need any recommendations for any vendors everyone on here is really helpful and we will be able to help you .HTH

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

Don't worry. My wedding is a month after yours and I also haven't done much. I have the date, place, band and photographer and that's it. I didn't plan on it but randomly tried on 2 dresses this weekend. Got an email about a sample sale so wanted to check it out. Turns out I loved the first one I put on - would have ordered it on the spot but feel like I need to at least go to 1 other place to say I tried others on.

I still have to do flowers, invites, limos, ceremony music, my dress, BM's dresses, tuxes, programs....what else am I forgetting? Basically I have a lot to do too - you're fine!

My best friend keeps reminding me she only had a 7 mo. engagement and she got it all done with no problems....my wedding is still 9 months away so I know I have time.

Dress is def. next on my list though. Then BM's dresses....I want to do flowers after that to be able to coordinate with the color I choose.

Good Luck!
And PS - I went to one of those bridal shows and found it to be the biggest waste of time. Some seem to like them but just wanted you to know - it was a waste of my Saturday and a waste of the $ they charged to get in!

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

wedding planning can be super overwhelming....ive found if i pick one thing and concentrate on that, its easier, otherwise its just too much. good luck, youve got lots of time

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

Hey date twin! I think you still have plenty of time - I think many of us are just getting htings done earlier than we need to because we're ADDICTED! Most of the planners start with '1 year - 6 months' ahead or even '6 months or more'. You got your hall and that's one of the toughest ones! As for the dress, as long as it's not from a foreign country you should be able to get almost any dress you want in time!

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

I think you'll be ok, and once you get started, it gets easier. If you are worried about your gown, what about taking an hour each week in a bridal salon, and trying some on. Have them write down what you like, and then you can come back w/ your mom and let her see. (it's not so bad alone, I've done it) Next, try to make a appt everytime you have a free couple of hours. Interview 3 vendors for each category. Then once you have all your info, you can make a better decision. Plus, once you finalize the BP, you can delegate jobs to them. That's what my friend did during her wedding planning. We each had a different thing to research b/c she was working full time and going to school while living in Queens, and her wedding was out east. Don't get discouraged now, and don't let the vendors scare you and make you think you don't have any time. You'll be ok!

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

Hi! Boy, i read your story, and think of myself. My dad is sick and has cancer, and we also started very late....as in December for our May wedding!! I have been running around like a maniac these last few month, and dont feel bad..I am getting married this MAY!! So, if i can do it, you can too. And you know what helps so much? What helps is all of these helpful ladies on this website...I only wish i knew about it earlier. Everyone giving you feedback, and advice, and telling you whos good and whos not, really will help you choose vendors much faster. So, if iy makes you feel any better, my wedding date is 05-19-06, and i still have the invites, limos, and just did the florist today. My advice is what i was told..Make a list of everything that you need to do one thing at a time(or it will get overhwelming), and then just KNOW that it will get done...and it will! Most importantly, make sure you still have fun! I told myself, if I do one thing a week, it will have to get done sooner or later, and here we are..a few months away. Dont get me wrong, it is a lot of work when you are pressured for time, but you still have 8 months, and that is plenty. I wish you the best of luck, and my prayers are with your mom. Any other questions, FM me, anytime.

Message edited 2/21/2006 7:26:36 PM.

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

Trust me all the planning will all fall right into place. Don't stress about it at ALL! My dress is from david bridal and dresses there only take about 3 months to come in, plenty of time! Everything will work out and you'll have a beautiful day!

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

No stressy

Take a deep breath and your in my prayers

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

It's ok! We got engaged 11/04, booked our hall in 8/05 and are getting married in April. The majority of the work has been accomplished in the past 8 months and it's been fine
Sorry you are so going through a lot right now and are stressed

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

Hi Date Twins (tandg and kittythestray)!!

I won't worry so much about being behind. I too haven't booked much except the hall, photographer/videographer and DJ. And I did that within the past month... all based on research from the feedback I got from the girls here. Thanks all!!

In fact, because I live in NJ and don't drive, I don't get to visit Long Island much except when my fiance wants to do some driving *sigh*. And he's in no rush whatsoever! He hasn't even picked his groomsmen yet!

Like you, I'm also shopping for my dress online 'cus I don't have the luxury of driving all over to the Jersey shops and the shops in the city are so expensive. Prices online are so much better anyway!

So you got company and no need to worry! I visited RK Bridal and they told me it takes about 4 months to get a dress in if you order so Oct is still 7 months away. As long as you get the dress ordered within the next month or so, you should be fine. If not, you can always order a white dress. Wedding dresses are soooo expensive anyway!

Good luck!

Message edited 2/21/2006 9:16:55 PM.

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

In some ways you are ahead of me. I have the places and the dress but no vendors and no bridesmaid dresses. Same problem with photographers. They are very difficult to meet with.

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

Try to relax and give yourself a break!!!!!

I was engaged in October and we set the date for April! You already have more time than i did and you have to two BIG things done already!!

Economize what time you do have by using this site to your advantage... round things down by checking out the reviews - asking questions here - then when you get to the nitty gritty, your work will be a little more pointed and efficient.

The girls on this site are very helpful!!

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

no, your not screwed.. make a list.. important first... then go down... you can do it... and with all our help are you kidding!!!!!

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

so sorry to hear this. . . is it possible for you to hire a wedding planner to ease up the planning stress you are feeling?

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

I'm also getting married in October. I do have all my vendors booked, but I managed to do it in 5 months. You have seven - I wouldn't sweat it.

I would highly recommend going to the LIW Bridal Extravaganza on Saturday. A large number of the LIW vendors will be there, and it will give you the opportunity to meet with a bunch of them in a limited amount of time.

I realize shopping for a gown is something you would like to do with your mother - but I wouldn't let her condition stop you. Take your top 5 dress picks and go try them on. When your mom can go, bring her back to the store to see your number one choice. If you have a sister/grandmother/best friend - take her along on the first round of visits if you're not comfortable going alone.

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

dont stress. if you feel yourslef stressed, try to just step back for a few days and do nothing wedding related at all. no websites, nothing. just relax in your free time for a few days. it is only a few days it wont kill you.

then step back and concentrate on what needs to be done and at what times. for example, book your reception hall and ceremony. those are the most important. i would then start looking at photographers and DJs. then florists and limos. also, it helps to call up vendors and get prices so then you can narrow it down. dont look at places that arent in your budget, you will only be heartbroken in the end.

dont stress about the dress, it will come to you. when you find it you will know.

i just had a bridal breakdown last month and took 2 weeks off. it helped me so much and i am now starting to put things in perspective and relax, as i am high strung.

and the brides review helps so much, check them out for vendors.

good luck!

if you stress it wont help, take some time out if you feel too overwhelmed and concentrate on one thing at a time!

Re: falling behind & depressed-rant

You will be okay. I am getting married in June and I still need alot to do. B/c of my work I usually have 1-2 saturdays available per month to do wedding stuff. Little by little, I hopeful everything will get done. I also rely on the internet alot.
I hope your mom gets better. Hang in there.