UPDATE ON PAGE 3 - What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

Can i just say - the friggin nerve of people!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I invited everyone I work with to my wedding and only those who are married (2 of them)with their husbands. Everyone else is invited solo - since we are on a tight budget and have limited seating. None of those who were invited solo are engaged.

I received the RSVP from a girl last night (WHO I CAN'T STAND MIND YOU and invited her just to be nice) that she is bringing a guest.

She wrote: "Ms. Stupid Idiot" and Guest
will __2__ attend

Now that she's put me in extremely akward position, i have to approach her. At this point, its not about the money or the people - but what I do for one, now I have to do for all. I can't stand people who just assume things like this.

Anyone have this happen to them?! Any advice????


UPDATE, UPDATE:

So I get home last night and in the mail is another RSVP from another girl in my work who I invited - SOLO. Her RSVP says ...

"Ms. Stupid Idiot 2" and MY MOTHER
will _2_ attend


DO YOU BELIEVE THIS?
Immediately after opening this - i called the first girl - the evil one - on her cell b/c she obviously talked to this other girl and told her its ok to respond with a guest. I left her a firm and some what nasty message saying ...

"I just received your RSVP for my wedding. We're happy you'll be able to attend but there must have been a big misunderstanding - the invitation was ONLY intended for you. I really wish that if you had any question about that - that you would have to come me and asked me, rather than assume otherwise. FH and I are on a very tight budget and I don't think we'll be able to accomodate you with a guest at our wedding."

I can not believe this nonsense. What in the world are people thinking??? And someone wants to bring her MOTHER?? WHAT THE HECK??????

Girls, word to the wise - If you have any doubts about inviting people from work - my advice is .... DON'T DO IT

Message edited 11/1/2005 10:41:13 AM.

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest who responds that they are bringing one!!!

I acyually received 3 like that.. so we just sucked it up..

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

oh my gosh, nervey

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

FH's guy friends, who were invited with their wives, decided they wanted to bring random guests since their wives couldn't come...I don't think so!!! FH told them that they were invited with their wives and if their wives couldn't come, then they couldn't bring a guest. Some people are so rude!!!

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

wow people are very rude-who does something like that?

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

Call the girl and tell her that the invitation was intended for her only, not her and a guest. Due to space and financial constrictions, you cannot have as many people as you would have liked and her guest cannot attend. Thats what we did. Even if you are able to pay for the, does not mean you HAVE to.

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

Since you dont even like her, I would tell her stright up, that you are sorry, but every one was invited to come solo.

If it was a friend or some one you cared about I would say deal with it.

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

This girl is EVIL mind you and I sincerely think she did it just to spite me. I have to say something to her but I am a nice person, so of course I don't want more drama. I'm thinking of just saying something along the lines of "Just so you know, the invite was addressed to YOU ONLY. FH and I will probably be able to "accomodate" you with your guest - but in the future you should know that when you receive an invite with just your name on it, it means that you are the only person who that invitation is intended for."

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

Some people are sooo rude!!

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

UGH! yup- we had that, too.... soo rude!!!
it was my moms friend from high school- a women in her 50s who never got married- my mom saw her a couple weeks before invites went out, and she wasn't dating anyone then, and there were other people she knew who were coming so we just invited her without a guest... and she sent back her response card with " and guest"... i was SOOO MAD!! how hard is it to understand that if it doesn't say " and guest", you're not invited with one....
but, since that was the only case like that, we just let it slide... but it ***** for you because the other single people you work with will find out....
i would just explain to her that because of money or space, you can only let people bring guests if its a spouse- good luck!!

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

That takes nerve - and she was obviuosly invited with work people, so its not like she wouldn't know anyone

I think you would be well within yoru rights to tell her "i'm sorry, due to space constrains, we can only accomodate the people who were invited. I hope that you can still make it."

Who knows, maybe she won't come!

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

Don't accomodate her guest. Then she has control over you. Put your foot down. Do you need some muscle to back you up?

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

What if this "guest" of hers is her FI or serious BF ? Would that make a difference? I would be upset if my DH was invited to a wedding (I'm talking before we were married) and had to go without me. I think that when you invite someone to your wedding,you take a risk of them writing " ___2___ will attend" if you leave the line blank. I've heard of brides filling them in for the guest.

We invited all our single friends 20something and over w/a guest..some brought,some didn't. One friend responded "3" first we thought it was a typo so (then) FI asked him and he said,get this..."I'm bringing 2 chicks cause I can't decide which one I want to be with" after getting over the weirdness of this,we had a good laugh,especially after seeing him walk into the room with a girl on each arm..needless to say,the jokes were endless. He's now know as "Hugh Heffner".
Anywhoooo..can I just say that he was MORE than generous with his gift.
Would you feel different if you knew that she was gonna cover herself and guest or is she so bittchy that you think your gonna get stiffed?

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

This girl is not even your friend. I would seriously tell her that you would love to have her bring a guest, but financially you can't swing it and you would feel bad allowing her to bring someone when noone else from work was invited with a date.

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

this girl is such a BIATCH and there is a lot of history w/her. She truly is one of those evil people in the world!! She acts stupid - but she knows exactly what she's doing.

If it were my choice, she would have never been invited to my wedding. But, i wanted to share the day with the women in my office and I would never exclude just 1 person.

Forget the fact that I don't even know her BF, nor do I ever care to know him. The point is - there are FAMILY members of mine who I didn't invite to this wedding b/c of money and seating constraints. And I am definitely going to make sure she knows this!!!

She's doing this to walk all over me - as she's done MANY times in the past! Its alright - she's in for a surprise

Message edited 10/28/2005 11:09:05 AM.

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

Ok, now my question to add on to this post is, what do you do if you invite someone with a guest, but they decide to bring their best friend..... not of the opposite sex.... what do you think about that? I always thought it was kind of rude to just bring a freind. This girl I was freinds with always brought her friend Julie everywhere. And the way I see it is if I wanted your best friend to come, i would have invited her.

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

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Posted by JennJay

Ok, now my question to add on to this post is, what do you do if you invite someone with a guest, but they decide to bring their best friend..... not of the opposite sex.... what do you think about that? I always thought it was kind of rude to just bring a freind. This girl I was freinds with always brought her friend Julie everywhere. And the way I see it is if I wanted your best friend to come, i would have invited her.

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Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

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Posted by JennJay

Ok, now my question to add on to this post is, what do you do if you invite someone with a guest, but they decide to bring their best friend..... not of the opposite sex.... what do you think about that? I always thought it was kind of rude to just bring a freind. This girl I was freinds with always brought her friend Julie everywhere. And the way I see it is if I wanted your best friend to come, i would have invited her.

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Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

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Posted by JennJay

Ok, now my question to add on to this post is, what do you do if you invite someone with a guest, but they decide to bring their best friend..... not of the opposite sex.... what do you think about that? I always thought it was kind of rude to just bring a freind. This girl I was freinds with always brought her friend Julie everywhere. And the way I see it is if I wanted your best friend to come, i would have invited her.

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Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

What if people are in a committed relationship they can't bring their spouse because they aren't married? I personally wouldn't invite single guests. I think it's nice to have someone with you that you know. I was in that situation and I didn't like it.

Now to your question, just tell her the truth.

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

You definitely don't have to allow her to bring a guest! You don't have to let anyone, but you definitely shouldn't if this is someone you did not want to invite in the first place and don't really like.

Keep us posted... Good luck and go kick some a**!!

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

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Posted by Sapphire77

What if people are in a committed relationship they can't bring their spouse because they aren't married? I personally wouldn't invite single guests. I think it's nice to have someone with you that you know. I was in that situation and I didn't like it.

Now to your question, just tell her the truth.

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Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

Ya know, I read something about this stuff once in a Miss Manners column (although of course I can't find it now)

I think what she said though, was that if a person is invited without a guest, htey obviously should not bring a guest. IF they are not comfortable doing that, they should politely decline the invite... so you should just tell your coworker that she must have misunderstood, and that all the coworkers were invited w/o guest and if she would like to rethink her response, you would understand. (you don't owe her an explanation of why she can't bring a guest, its none of her business. nobody was. period.)

As for the question of which "guest" is acceptable, a friend or only a spouse. I think miss manners said that you reserved two seats in her honor, and its not up to you who she is allowed to bring when you address it "and guest". Just because the invitee isn't part of a couple doesn't mean she should automatically be unable to bring someone. THink of it like this, if she brings a friend, she's most likely doing it cause she knows it will add to her having a good time as opposed to bringing an opposite-sex guest and having to "babysit" that person.

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

" THink of it like this, if she brings a friend, she's most likely doing it cause she knows it will add to her having a good time as opposed to bringing an opposite-sex guest and having to "babysit" that person.

Re: What to do when someone is not invited with a guest and responds that they are bringing one!!!

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Posted by LM903


She wrote: "Ms. Stupid Idiot" and Guest
will __2__ attend

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