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Soccer_Girl
"I'm Addicted"
Member since 10/04 1479 total posts
Wedding Date:
4/17/2008 1:05 AM
Wed. Location:
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Message edited 11/4/2006 5:56:13 PM.
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Posted 9/5/05 4:05 PM 
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gigles319
"I'm Addicted"
Member since 8/05 1508 total posts
Wedding Date:
10/8/2006 4:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Hamlet Willow Creek A+
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
maybe give him a limit, or give him a time for when he can start drinking like after your first dance with him
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Posted 9/5/05 4:09 PM
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PegaLega
Lets Get This!!!!!
Member since 6/05 29825 total posts
Wedding Date:
5/25/2007 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Chateau Briand
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
that is a hard one...What if you tell your dad that you are limiting liquor intake to guests? I dont know what else you could do but lie or suck it up
My mom is like that-2 good drinks and she is done...she WILL NOT be drinking but she knows she is an *** when she drinks, so it makes that situation easier to deal with for me.
Do what feels right to you...if you feel he will embarrass you tell him and talk to him
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Posted 9/5/05 4:09 PM
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KerriSteve
Board Fanatic
Member since 3/05 330 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/9/2006 11:30 AM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Maybe you could just talk to him one on one. Maybe take him out to lunch and tell him how you feel about the things that he says when he's drinking. Maybe then he will limit himself without you asking him to.
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Posted 9/5/05 4:52 PM
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NPTbride
Almost One!
Member since 6/05 1652 total posts
Wedding Date:
4/29/2006 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
Land's End
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
I wish I knew the right answer for you. We have an issue because my FMIL is an alcoholic. We are purposely having an afternoon wedding so there will be fewer people (we hope) getting insanely drunk.
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Posted 9/5/05 5:32 PM
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070306
That was the best day ever!!!!
Member since 7/05 1123 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/3/2006 4:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Venetian Yacht Club A++++++++
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Do you have a good relationship with your dad? I would talk to him, just bring up the last two stuff that happened with liquor involved. If the conversation starts going bad then avoid topic. If he is listening and understanding I would let him know.
Good luck this is a hard one.
Maybe tell the bartender to cut him off.
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Posted 9/5/05 5:33 PM
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SummerBride06
SummerBaby08 on the way!!
Member since 5/05 3936 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/8/2006 10:00 AM
Wed. Location:
Westbury Manor A+
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
maybe ask the bartenders to water down his drinks?
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Posted 9/5/05 5:37 PM
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beautyq115
Board Princess
Member since 12/04 16774 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/16/2006 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Swan Club...AMAZING
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Posted by SummerBride06
maybe ask the bartenders to water down his drinks?
This sounds like a good idea IMO
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Posted 9/5/05 5:41 PM
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NPTbride
Almost One!
Member since 6/05 1652 total posts
Wedding Date:
4/29/2006 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
Land's End
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Posted by SummerBride06
maybe ask the bartenders to water down his drinks?
OOOhhhhh... I love this idea! Thank you for the excellent suggestion. 
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Posted 9/5/05 5:48 PM
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Moehick
So Happy Together
Member since 9/03 7333 total posts
Wedding Date:
3/14/2004 4:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Westbury Manor
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Maybe keep him busy with tasks....Dad, can you check on this or can you do that
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Posted 9/5/05 6:50 PM
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prncssrachel
One happy family!
Member since 2/03 11213 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/3/2005 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
The Bourne Mansion
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
I think what you need to do is invite him over to your place. Give him a bunch of drinks and videotape him. Then at a later, sober date, show him the tape. I'm being totally serious. Maybe he really doesn't realize what he is like when he's drunk. But you can also say that you and FH are not going to drink that night because after spending so much money, you want to be able to remember every moment of it, and maybe that perspective will appeal to him. I'm so sorry you even have to worry about this!
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Posted 9/5/05 7:10 PM
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Soccer_Girl
"I'm Addicted"
Member since 10/04 1479 total posts
Wedding Date:
4/17/2008 1:05 AM
Wed. Location:
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Message edited 11/4/2006 3:39:14 PM.
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Posted 9/5/05 8:39 PM
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Steph62406
come on baby dust
Member since 2/05 1365 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/24/2006 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
A perfect place for us
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Why don't you say.... Dad me and FI have been thinking that this is a once in a life time moment and plan on not really drinking at the wedding and where hopeing that the parents would do the same, we really want everyone to truly remember this special time.
This way your not putting it all on him! Good Luck
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Posted 9/5/05 9:17 PM
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SomethingBlu
Enjoying the journey...
Member since 10/04 10523 total posts
Wedding Date:
5/27/2005 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Jericho Terrace - A+
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
I honestly don't think you can say anything to him, especially given the fact that he's paying for part of your wedding. Maybe you could designate a member of your family to "take care" of him. My brother did this for my mom and my dad (they are divorced and sat in separate tables across from each other)...he made sure my mom didn't eat cheese (silly, I know but she's intolerant and still eats it  ) and my dad didn't drink too much. My brother had an arrangement with the bartender...it honestly worked out great and both my parents had an awesome time at the wedding. Yeah, it's babysitting a parent, but oh well.
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Posted 9/5/05 9:23 PM
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Pmpkn087
Board Fanatic
Member since 5/05 876 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/25/2005 4:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Caffe on the Green
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Posted by SummerBride06
maybe ask the bartenders to water down his drinks?
I was thinking the same exact thing!
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Posted 9/5/05 9:23 PM
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lisaslove
Married life is amazing!!!!
Member since 8/05 3168 total posts
Wedding Date:
3/31/2007 1:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Fox Hollow A +++ Beautiful!!
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
I think maybe you should talk to your dad about it, but not put him on the spot. The 2 of you should go to lunch and have a serious, but casual convo about this and see what he says.
the watering down of the drinks sounds good too....
Message edited 9/5/2005 9:25:57 PM.
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Posted 9/5/05 9:25 PM
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WedHead
"I'm Addicted"
Member since 2/05 1438 total posts
Wedding Date:
10/28/2005 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Will he drink O-Douls? Maybe you can say you made sure the venue has it on hand for people that want to alternate with something non-alcoholic.
It's a sticky subject, but I can understand your anxiety. I would also ask one of his close relatives to be on watch for him. Someone who can casually say, "how bout slowing down so you remember the night?" type of thing.
Good luck!
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Posted 9/5/05 9:29 PM
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October Bliss
Beyond Obsession
Member since 8/05 7629 total posts
Wedding Date:
10/8/2006 2:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Country Gardens @ East Wind
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
You can of course ask him not to drink, but it doesn't really sound like that will get you anywhere.
I suggest a contingency plan. Someone to escort him outside when he starts getting loud (unless he is the type that will take a swing at whoever is trying to get him outside, because of course he is not going to miss any of his little girl's wedding). Making sure the videographer knows not to film him after he has had a few (this way you won't be reminded over and over). Watering down the drinks (both with bartender and wait staff), and talking to your maitre d' about the wait staff being extra slow whenever he orders a drink. Assigning him specific tasks that will keep him away from the bar.
Of course, you could chalk it up to being the thing that will "go wrong" at the wedding and just decide you are going to ignore and/or overlook it, and enjoy the heck out of your day.
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Posted 9/5/05 9:34 PM
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ssdbk
Kerie
Member since 1/05 3960 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/12/2005 7:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Temple Chaverim
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
$$$ or not, you CAN ask him not to drink. He is giving you $ for your wedding, not [aying for the right to make you or your family look bad.
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Posted 9/5/05 9:55 PM
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stephanief
It's fun to be ONE!!!!
Member since 7/05 4523 total posts
Wedding Date:
4/15/2006 6:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Lake Ronkonkoma
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
I think if your father paid 20k towards your wedding, you DO NOT have any right to tell him anything. If you paid for your wedding then I would say yes but he paid a huge amount of money so that's JMO
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Posted 9/6/05 10:52 AM
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johnsae
MARRIED!!!!
Member since 3/05 6258 total posts
Wedding Date:
5/6/2006 5:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Capitale
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
I've already discussed this with my Dad - he says that he promises he is not going to drink a lot (at least not until late-night) on my wedding date. I trust that he will not drink a lot - I hope he will want to remember the night, especially since he has put so much $ towards it.
Hopefully since your dad has put more than $20k towards the wedding, he will feel the same way as my Dad. Good luck!
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Posted 9/6/05 11:19 AM
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Blu-ize
My House
Member since 8/04 8305 total posts
Wedding Date:
2/28/1998 6:00 PM
Wed. Location:
East Meadow Jewish Center
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Posted by NPTbride
Posted by SummerBride06
maybe ask the bartenders to water down his drinks?
OOOhhhhh... I love this idea! Thank you for the excellent suggestion.
this is an excellent suggestion. After a few, he will never know that they are watered down. Tell the bartender to give him two full strength and the rest 1/2 strength. You can also have someone run interference. If he's going to the bar a lot have someone grab him and dance with him instead.
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Posted 9/6/05 11:29 AM
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EmberLynn
Keeping it real!
Member since 11/03 3515 total posts
Wedding Date:
10/6/2006 2:00 PM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Could you have an uncle, aunt, sibbling, your mom (his girlfriend or new wife,) friend baby sit him?
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Posted 9/6/05 12:01 PM
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Beth1210
I want to do it again!
Member since 6/05 4048 total posts
Wedding Date:
12/10/2005 7:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Flowerfield
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Posted by NPTbride
Posted by SummerBride06
maybe ask the bartenders to water down his drinks?
OOOhhhhh... I love this idea! Thank you for the excellent suggestion.
I was going to say the same thing
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Posted 9/6/05 12:01 PM
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glinda_goodwitch
I married my best friend...
Member since 3/05 8735 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/17/2006 5:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Jericho Terrace
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Re: Can I ask my dad not to drink at the wedding?
Posted by Pmpkn087
Posted by SummerBride06
maybe ask the bartenders to water down his drinks?
I was thinking the same exact thing!
I know, I was totally thinking this! I think it's the best way to prevent anything bad from happening, while at the same time not hurting your dad's feelings.
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Posted 9/6/05 12:06 PM
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