Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

Last week I sent out an email to all of my BM saying that they should start making fitting appointments, what shoes, some day of details, etc.

This morning I got a response from one of the girls saying that she couldn't be in my wedding.

THERE ARE LESS THAN TWO MONTHS LEFT AT THIS POINT!

She asked me to be in her wedding and at the time, I was out of work for several months with an injury and couldn't afford to be in her wedding and let her know it 7 months prior to her wedding and before dresses or anything been ordered. Bear in mind that her wedding was 2 weeks ago and I went and gave a gift. I also went to her shower and offered to help her with anything else she needed help with on several occassions leading to her wedding.

I am so mad that she did this and I told her so. There was no reason given and I am owed an explanation. I feel like she used me to come to her wedding and make her minimum and have me give a gift. She must have known 2 weeks ago that she planned on backing out of my wedding, but she let me believe all was fine.

I am more mad at this point since she should know better than anyone having just gone through this process that people lay out money for BP gifts, etc. and I have done that at this point.

I would have understood had she done this in a timely manner, but I now I just feel used. Maybe she made me come to her wedding and give her a gift so that her dress for my wedding would be paid for? I just don't get it.

Sorry this is so long, I just had to vent to people who would understand.

Message edited 9/5/2005 12:42:35 PM.

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

how can she NOT give you a reason for dropping out of the BP????? that's CRAZY!

did she say she can't make the wedding at all? doesn't she already have her dress (that she paid for??) this doesn't make any sense

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

I hope she doesn't plan on coming to the wedding, especially after what I responded with. She should at least send back her invitation response with a big NO. I don't want her there at this point anyway.

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

I would try & cancel your check if she hasn't cashed it yet....especially if you think she used you...that is just rude.

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

Unfortunately being her friend, I gave her cash. I can tell you this....We live and we learn.

What makes things worse to me, is that she had several people drop out of her wedding and much later than me. Says something about the bride I guess.

I at least did right by our friendship and was honest and did it with enough time. I offered to help her, but being in a wedding is expensive and at the time, I was not able to afford it.

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

Wow I have no words for you...just hugs!

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

didn't she already pay for her dress? this makes no sense. do you think she's mad at you about something?

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

She already paid for her dress. I think she is just mad that I dropped out of hers but I wish she would have done it sooner. Less than 8 weeks is unacceptable. Don't you think?

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

---

Posted by JCMsGirl05

She already paid for her dress. I think she is just mad that I dropped out of hers but I wish she would have done it sooner. Less than 8 weeks is unacceptable. Don't you think?

---

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

Some of the girls on BHB didn't feel the same way.

Message edited 9/5/2005 1:12:10 PM.

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

I cannot believe someone would do this to a "friend"... I am sorry you are going through this. What did you say to her?? And to tell you this in an email is totally wrong. She should of said all this to you in person. Shame on her!!!

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

I don't mind the email honestly. I just wish she had done it sooner. All the plans have been made. Now I have to change things and I am stuck with things I ordered for her and I feel like it was more spiteful than anything else.

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

---

Posted by JCMsGirl05

I don't mind the email honestly. I just wish she had done it sooner. All the plans have been made. Now I have to change things and I am stuck with things I ordered for her and I feel like it was more spiteful than anything else.

---

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

I seriously would be tempted to egg, toilet paper, shaving cream her house her car or something! (Well, maybe not really, but I'd like to I think) That is bulls#!t! That is NO friend! You are better off not having her, she'd probably not smile in any of your pictures and make the morning of your wedding just really horrible! Your true friends will be there. It ***** for now, but I think you'll be better off in the end!

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

that's horrible if she's doing it for that reason! If so, maybe u would n't want her there anyway if that's the kind of friend she is.

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

OMG I would have killed her! And to not even give a reason???

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

She said it was in both of our best interests if she decline being in the bridal party and that we have many issues. Only issue I can think of is that she is pissed that I dropped out of hers. But to do it this close is just wrong in my opinion. She she know, since someone dropped out of hers at about this time, maybe even closer to hers.

We live and we learn, I guess. I am mad.

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

You have every right to be sweety!

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

it does suck that this was done to you so close to your wedding, but like everything in life there are 2 sides to every story. It doesnt make sense that she would even pay the money for her BM dress, knowing how every penny counts when planning your own wedding. It seems to me that we are not getting the whole story here.

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

If there is more to it then, I would like to know what it is. Looks to me like you made up this name to answer this post? Hmmm.

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

maybe I'm just a fair minded person, who doesnt believe people do mean spirited spiteful things for no good reason

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

Thanks for your opinion, but I know this person.

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

Re: Some people have SOME NERVE...VENT

I'm sorry that your BM dropped out but for her to do so late in the game makes me wonder - did you guys have a falling out? Did something go wrong involving your role in her wedding?

Sounds like your best bet is to let go and move on. You have your wedding now to look forward to and I am sure that will be great.