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Junebride06
Board Fanatic
Member since 11/04 540 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/11/2006 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Lombardi's on the Sound
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Living together before wedding
Does anyone feel like people treat your wedding differently because you already live with your FH? I sometimes get the impression that people don't think it's as "special" because it's like we are already married (we've lived together in our own home for 2 years). Can anyone else relate? Has anyone else regretted moving in before their wedding?
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Posted 6/14/05 12:47 PM 
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johnsae
MARRIED!!!!
Member since 3/05 6258 total posts
Wedding Date:
5/6/2006 5:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Capitale
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Re: Living together before wedding
I don't regret it at all. I think it's the best decision I ever made. I have heard many people talk about how they wish they had done it - they would have discovered much earlier that they weren't compatible....
I think it is a smart move, and no; I haven't gotten any negative vibes/reactions from people because FH and I live together. I think that is an old-fashioned approach anyway.
Good luck with your decision!
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Posted 6/14/05 12:52 PM
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july06bride
Happy First Anniversary to Us!
Member since 12/04 7794 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/1/2006 2:45 PM
Wed. Location:
East Wind Estate
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Re: Living together before wedding
i agree- BEST decision we made- and no one seems to be treating it as any less special
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Posted 6/14/05 12:54 PM
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TimDogsGal
Board Fanatic
Member since 5/05 952 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/29/2006 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
Brentwood Country Club
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Re: Living together before wedding
I Think it was a good decision......i LOVE living with FH
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Posted 6/14/05 1:01 PM
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kms71705
Board Fanatic
Member since 1/05 464 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/17/2005 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
North Ritz Club
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Re: Living together before wedding
I am so happy that FH and I live together. We got all the "kinks" out before the wedding :0)!!! I do feel like people don't think it's as big a deal as if we didn't live together. I feel in my heart we are already married too, this is just getting that piece of paper to make it legal :0)!!!
Kelly
33 DTG!!!
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Posted 6/14/05 1:07 PM
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SomethingBlu
Enjoying the journey...
Member since 10/04 10523 total posts
Wedding Date:
5/27/2005 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Jericho Terrace - A+
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Re: Living together before wedding
Posted by Junebride06
Does anyone feel like people treat your wedding differently because you already live with your FH? I sometimes get the impression that people don't think it's as "special" because it's like we are already married (we've lived together in our own home for 2 years). Can anyone else relate? Has anyone else regretted moving in before their wedding?
I can totally relate...I don't regret moving in together because it was necessary in our case (I needed to know what I was "getitng into"  ) I did feel that people weren't as enthusiastic about our wedding and a lot of them felt that we were married already (which clearly, we weren't). But that's partly because we have been together for 9 years and engaged for 4 of those...so everyone was like "when is it again?"
Sorry so long, just wanted to say that yes, I can relate and yes, people acted like it wasn't a "big deal" BUT the day of was the most magical day and I completely feel like a new love and chapter started - even after all this time. So hang in there, it's totally worth it! 
Edited because I can't spell! 
Message edited 6/14/2005 1:08:26 PM.
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Posted 6/14/05 1:07 PM
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Junebride06
Board Fanatic
Member since 11/04 540 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/11/2006 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Lombardi's on the Sound
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Re: Living together before wedding
Thanks..I really appreciate that. We've just been getting a lot of flack from his parents (they thing it's a bad idea to spend so much money when we already started our life, etc.) and it makes me wonder if we are doing the right thing having a big wedding. Someone else mentioned that they feel like they are already married and it's only a piece of paper - that 's kind of my point! Then what is the meaning of a wedding if you only see it as a piece of paper? Sorry to be getting soooo deeeep.... I'm just having issues!!!
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Posted 6/14/05 1:14 PM
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RedHead
6 people and counting :*
Member since 10/03 18761 total posts
Wedding Date:
10/2/2004 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
Fox Hollow :)
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Re: Living together before wedding
Posted by Junebride06
Does anyone feel like people treat your wedding differently because you already live with your FH? I sometimes get the impression that people don't think it's as "special" because it's like we are already married (we've lived together in our own home for 2 years). Can anyone else relate? Has anyone else regretted moving in before their wedding?
no i was never treated differently.
and NO i do not regret it at all....In fact i thik it was one of my best decisions!
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Posted 6/14/05 1:16 PM
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SomethingBlu
Enjoying the journey...
Member since 10/04 10523 total posts
Wedding Date:
5/27/2005 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Jericho Terrace - A+
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Re: Living together before wedding
Posted by Junebride06
Thanks..I really appreciate that. We've just been getting a lot of flack from his parents (they thing it's a bad idea to spend so much money when we already started our life, etc.) and it makes me wonder if we are doing the right thing having a big wedding. Someone else mentioned that they feel like they are already married and it's only a piece of paper - that 's kind of my point! Then what is the meaning of a wedding if you only see it as a piece of paper? Sorry to be getting soooo deeeep.... I'm just having issues!!!
I too felt like we were "married" and it was " a piece of paper" but trust me, it is different and worth it! At least for us, it made us love each other more and now we're family - which we weren't before. Ignore the people that say it's a waste - it's NOT! You are taking your relationship and commintment to each other to the next and most beautiful (and natural) level - you are doing the right thing if you desire to be married. I know not everyone is the same and not everyone wants to get married (I didn't believe in it growing up) but being married and living together (even for 4 years, like us) is completely different. The day of you will feel bridal, special and like it was the best decision ever made - the celebration and reception is just that - a celebration of your accomplishment and union!
Phew, sorry, I guess I'm chatty today! 
Message edited 6/14/2005 1:25:37 PM.
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Posted 6/14/05 1:25 PM
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Sweetpea130000
TIME IS FLYING!!!!
Member since 7/04 4165 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/19/2005 2:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Riviera @ Massapequa A++++++++++
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Re: Living together before wedding
Posted by RedHead
no i was never treated differently.
and NO i do not regret it at all....In fact i thik it was one of my best decisions!
I totally agree!
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Posted 6/14/05 1:33 PM
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RVCBride
Board Fanatic
Member since 9/04 798 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/4/2005 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Westbury Manor
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Re: Living together before wedding
best decision ever!
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Posted 6/14/05 1:39 PM
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wood2be
My Prince has come!
Member since 1/04 2639 total posts
Wedding Date:
10/10/2004 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Montauk Yacht Club - FM me for details
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Re: Living together before wedding
I wish I had. It would have made the transition a little easier.
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Posted 6/14/05 1:40 PM
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acre730
Board Fanatic
Member since 5/05 790 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/30/2005 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
Milleridge Inn
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Re: Living together before wedding
I do feel like some people look at my wedding in a slightly different way because FI and I live together.... I went away to visit a college friend a few months ago and I got to meet some of her friends..When I would talk about the wedding they were all interested in hearing all about it, but when it came up that FI and I live together now there were eyebrows raised, and interest in the wedding all but disappeared...There were all girls who were in their 20's who were raising the eyebrows and I was shocked at their reactions (maybe it was because I was in another part of the country..who knows)...As far as regretting the decision to move in before marriage...NEVER 
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Posted 6/14/05 1:43 PM
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Junebride06
Board Fanatic
Member since 11/04 540 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/11/2006 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Lombardi's on the Sound
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Re: Living together before wedding
Well, from what most of you have said, I can tell you don't regret moving in together, but does it affect the way you are planning your wedding? Do you feel like you shouldn't be spending the money?
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Posted 6/14/05 1:57 PM
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Sweetpea130000
TIME IS FLYING!!!!
Member since 7/04 4165 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/19/2005 2:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Riviera @ Massapequa A++++++++++
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Re: Living together before wedding
Definitely doesn't affect our planning, this is a once in a lifetime event and I will have the wedding of my dreams!
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Posted 6/14/05 2:04 PM
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103005FallBride
I married the love of my life
Member since 2/05 7248 total posts
Wedding Date:
10/30/2005 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
Westbury Manor A++
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Re: Living together before wedding
 Definitely don't regret moving in with FH. Thankfully no one is treating us or the wedding any differently because of us moving in together 2 & 1/2 years before getting married.
Regarding the money...sometimes, but I know if we didn't spend our money on the wedding..we would always regret it. The dream of a house is always there, but it's just going to happen a little later than we'd like. 
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Posted 6/14/05 2:18 PM
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PrincessConsuela
Almost there 2 yrs 2-3-08
Member since 7/04 2686 total posts
Wedding Date:
2/3/2006 7:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Fox Hollow
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Re: Living together before wedding
well i just moved in with my fh about two weeks ago and so far so good. So far i love it.
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Posted 6/14/05 2:21 PM
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