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lolita4life
me and my loves
Member since 9/04 5543 total posts
Wedding Date:
3/1/2005 4:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Las Vegas
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Cold Feet
anyone????
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Posted 2/12/05 11:23 AM 
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jimmysgrl
It's An Obsession
Member since 10/04 3543 total posts
Wedding Date:
12/3/2005 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Harrison House
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Re: Cold Feet
Naaaa, not yet! I've still got 10 months 
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Posted 2/12/05 11:26 AM
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DMcK
I love my husband & puppies!
Member since 4/04 5037 total posts
Wedding Date:
5/13/2005 7:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Westbury Manor
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Re: Cold Feet
Not about my darling FH but about other things like my dress!
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Posted 2/12/05 11:32 AM
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neeniebean86
live. love. laugh.
Member since 8/04 6576 total posts
Wedding Date:
2/19/2005 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Cold Feet
Actually.... Funny thing is that FH always teases me because i LITERALLY always have cold feet. even if i have like 2 pairs of socks on 
ok, i know that doesnt answer your question though 
I dont have cold feet about marrying Mike,,, but i'm definately getting nervous... But the only part that makes me nervous is that initial moment when the church doors open and i seen a million people (i know it wont be That many,, but it will feel like that).. staring at me. Once i get through that part though, i'll be fine 
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Posted 2/12/05 11:32 AM
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Mrs_B
SkitzoOoOoO
Member since 11/04 7159 total posts
Wedding Date:
9/17/2005 7:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Larkfield Manor
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Re: Cold Feet
Posted by DIJBH
Not about my darling FH but about other things like my dress!
same here 
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Posted 2/12/05 11:56 AM
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traceyd
2 yrs!!!!!!!!
Member since 11/04 2180 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/4/2005 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Estate at East Wind
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Re: Cold Feet
not yet I still have a ways to go!
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Posted 2/12/05 12:00 PM
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Corduroy94
Very Happily Married!
Member since 8/03 1845 total posts
Wedding Date:
9/4/2005 4:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Fox Hollow A++
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Re: Cold Feet
Not yet but I have a ways to go...
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Posted 2/12/05 12:19 PM
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ckgmwedding
Baby Grace is 1 year old!
Member since 6/04 4817 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/16/2005 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Merchant Marine Academy- Melville Hall A++++++++++
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Re: Cold Feet
Posted by neeniebean86
Actually.... Funny thing is that FH always teases me because i LITERALLY always have cold feet. even if i have like 2 pairs of socks on
ok, i know that doesnt answer your question though
I dont have cold feet about marrying Mike,,, but i'm definately getting nervous... But the only part that makes me nervous is that initial moment when the church doors open and i seen a million people (i know it wont be That many,, but it will feel like that).. staring at me. Once i get through that part though, i'll be fine
Totally with you on that on- I hate when people are looking at me. That's why I am having my dad AND mom walk me down the aisle so I can hide
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Posted 2/12/05 12:24 PM
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unicorn1178
I love Being Married
Member since 11/03 1242 total posts
Wedding Date:
10/22/2005 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
Stewart Manor Country Club
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Re: Cold Feet
Cold Feet, no. Sweat dripping, nauseous, feel like wanting to become an ostrich when people keep reminding me that its my day and everyone will be there to see me and about how long the church aisle is!! 
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Posted 2/12/05 1:15 PM
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chachou22
I am in wedding bliss!!!!!
Member since 10/04 1864 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/31/2005 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Huntington townhouse
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Re: Cold Feet
Posted by neeniebean86
But the only part that makes me nervous is that initial moment when the church doors open and i seen a million people (i know it wont be That many,, but it will feel like that).. staring at me. Once i get through that part though, i'll be fine
Ditto
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Posted 2/12/05 1:35 PM
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JLP
^ Not my initials anymore!
Member since 4/04 1099 total posts
Wedding Date:
3/12/2005 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
The Riviera
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Re: Cold Feet
I'm only nervous about the way it will all come together. All my planning. All my little details. Will they be noticed?
I'm not nervous about marrying him though. Been waiting foor that all my life.
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Posted 2/12/05 1:36 PM
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JPC1125
Friendship=the key to marriage
Member since 6/04 5052 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/25/2005 4:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Crest Hollow
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Re: Cold Feet
nah...still too far away
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Posted 2/12/05 2:34 PM
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David'sbride
Soon to be Mom of Twins!!!!
Member since 7/04 3412 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/4/2005 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
Watermill
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Re: Cold Feet
No way am I nervous about marrying FH. We lived parallel lives for so long before actually meeting each other... went to the same college, same dorm, knew so many people in common but yet never met, that I knos it is meant to be.
I am nervous about a few of the wedding guests. His Aunt Barbara is VERY socially inappropriate... starts conversations in the middle of a funeral service etc. MY nightmare is that while I'm walking down the aisle her arm will come out of nowhere, grab me and shout, "Wow, I hope you didn't pay a lot for that dress" or something equally crazy. We think she was born with a low IQ but I hae a mentally retarded cousin and he is the picture of social etiquette compared to Aunt Barbara... UGH!
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Posted 2/12/05 3:15 PM
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naps627
Board Fanatic
Member since 2/05 774 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/10/2005 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Inn at East Wind
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Re: Cold Feet
just nervous not scared i know he is the one.
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Posted 2/12/05 3:57 PM
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brooklynbridezilla
Ever After
Member since 4/04 6651 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/5/2005 12:30 PM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Cold Feet
I get cold feet about the wedding all the time, but definitely not the marriage.
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Posted 2/12/05 4:10 PM
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littlebookworm4
Old and married
Member since 10/03 4789 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/18/2005 7:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Thatched Cottage
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Re: Cold Feet
i've been with the man for 10 years - if i get cold feet now then i'm in trouble!! 
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Posted 2/12/05 6:22 PM
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diamondgrlie
Board Princess
Member since 2/04 10473 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/3/2005 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Woodbury Country Club - A+
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Re: Cold Feet
Happy to report NO.
I have been looking forward to being his wife for 7 years.
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Posted 2/12/05 8:05 PM
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lolita4life
me and my loves
Member since 9/04 5543 total posts
Wedding Date:
3/1/2005 4:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Las Vegas
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Re: Cold Feet
im just worried about things that i want him to change WONT change after we get married. he knows i wont marry him if he doesnt change his ways on two situations... i just dont want to get hurt again and be MARRIED!!!
we had a really big "talk" (and by talk i mean fight) about it last night. i think i got the message through. he almost started to cry and i knew then that i wanted to marry him.
i guess i just wanted to get EVERYTHING off my chest before i do!!!
hope thats not bad!
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Posted 2/12/05 9:57 PM
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CPAPPAS
Board Fanatic
Member since 1/05 328 total posts
Wedding Date:
2/26/2005 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
Vill Lombardis
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Re: Cold Feet
I say you're a smart person to talk about those things before the wedding. Alot of people don't do that. I'm very happy and in love with fh-can't imagine life without him- but i am nervous about marriage. I know enough that it is alot of work, and alot of compremise, and both parties have to be willing to be there "for better or worse" cause they both come. I'd say yes, i'm nervous....but not having second thoughts...i just make sure i talk to fh about them...then i feel better! Hope this doesn't sound to "preachy"...just wanted to let you know you're not alone!
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Posted 2/12/05 10:21 PM
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neeniebean86
live. love. laugh.
Member since 8/04 6576 total posts
Wedding Date:
2/19/2005 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Cold Feet
Posted by lolita4life
im just worried about things that i want him to change WONT change after we get married. he knows i wont marry him if he doesnt change his ways on two situations... i just dont want to get hurt again and be MARRIED!!!
we had a really big "talk" (and by talk i mean fight) about it last night. i think i got the message through. he almost started to cry and i knew then that i wanted to marry him.
i guess i just wanted to get EVERYTHING off my chest before i do!!!
hope thats not bad!
I dont think its bad that you guys had a fight and you got everything off of your chest... its a normal thing in any healthy relationship.
BUT if the only way that you will be happy in your marriage is IF he Changes, then i think theres some more things that you need to work out either with him or with yourself. Marriage isnt a band aid, and if it was broken before, it will still be broken after. these are things that you need to Resolve... not force him to change. You dont marry someone to change them... you marry them because they ARE the person you want to be with.
I know its hard, Jes, but you need to resolve this asap. And, as much as *I* hate to admit it, it may be something that you have to compromise on. I know it $ucks, but itll make your life so much easier. FH's bachelor party was last month... he knows i have an issue with strippers, and it goes deep, like the thought of it seriously disgusts me. Anyway, everytime he goes to a bachelor party, i would be pi$$ed for even days afterwards. For his BP though, i knew they were gonna get strippers, and i wouldnt take that away from him- i wouldnt make him stay home from his friends BPs when they were there, so i definately wouldnt take this away from him- not that its my place to anyway, im not his mother. Anyway, it was still eating away at me, and i ended up spending the day with my Dad and we had a long talk. He asked.. "Do you love him? Yes. Do you trust him? Yes Do you think he'd Ever do anything inappropriate? No. Then let it go. Trust me when i say it's not worth it. there's going to be things that each of you do that the other one isn't happy about, but you have to choose which ones to hold onto and which ones to let go of. If you dont let go, you can never move forward"
Seriously, my dad is the last one to give advice EVERRRR, and the last one to defend anyone thats Not his family (MY happiness is what comes 1st.. not an outsider, ya know?). So for him to say this meant more than i ever imagined... and ya know what? I let it go, and seriously, its been complete happiness since then. You really have to choose your battles, and figure out 1. is this one worth it and 2. will you still have a happy marriage IF he doesnt change?
its hard, b/c i dont know details, but i feel like so much in a relationship really comes down to this.
Good luck 
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Posted 2/12/05 10:26 PM
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neeniebean86
live. love. laugh.
Member since 8/04 6576 total posts
Wedding Date:
2/19/2005 11:00 AM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Cold Feet
oy! that was long! Sorry if it was preachy 
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Posted 2/12/05 10:29 PM
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SomethingBlu
Enjoying the journey...
Member since 10/04 10523 total posts
Wedding Date:
5/27/2005 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Jericho Terrace - A+
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Re: Cold Feet
Posted by lolita4life
im just worried about things that i want him to change WONT change after we get married. he knows i wont marry him if he doesnt change his ways on two situations... i just dont want to get hurt again and be MARRIED!!!
we had a really big "talk" (and by talk i mean fight) about it last night. i think i got the message through. he almost started to cry and i knew then that i wanted to marry him.
i guess i just wanted to get EVERYTHING off my chest before i do!!!
hope thats not bad!
No cold feet here, but I just want to add to what Neenie said - you can't marry someone hoping they will change. Sadly, most people don't change - you have to accept the faults and move on, hope that they work on the issues, of course, but if the only way you'll marry him is *if* he changes you may be setting yourself up for heartbreak. Does he see the need to change? If so, why does he keep doing the things that bother you? He needs to want to change for himself, not for you - we can only change for us.
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Posted 2/12/05 10:48 PM
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Dooodles
My two loves
Member since 7/04 4189 total posts
Wedding Date:
1/15/2005 12:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Riviera
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Re: Cold Feet
Jes - I had no cold feet about marrying DH, it was really only about the day itself unfolding. I was about to pretty much write the same as Neenie, but I didn't want it to repeat the same words. Please read Neenie's response VERY carefully. I love what she wrote about marriage not being a band-aid. I believe you need to trust your own life in your FH hands before marriage.
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Posted 2/13/05 9:39 AM
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jimmysgrl
It's An Obsession
Member since 10/04 3543 total posts
Wedding Date:
12/3/2005 3:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Harrison House
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Re: Cold Feet
Posted by Dooodles
Jes - I had no cold feet about marrying DH, it was really only about the day itself unfolding. I was about to pretty much write the same as Neenie, but I didn't want it to repeat the same words. Please read Neenie's response VERY carefully. I love what she wrote about marriage not being a band-aid. I believe you need to trust your own life in your FH hands before marriage.
Very well said. I don't want you to think that we're trying to tell you you are wrong for feeling that way and I hope you know that at points, it is very common to have cold feet so we really do appreciate you sharing and talking to us about it. Do you guys live together? Or are you guys living a part? If there is something that bothers you in a relationship, you were so smart to talk to him about it, you really were. The ONE thing that scares me about marriage is cheating. My FH has never once cheated on me and I believe that he never will.....BUT...the potential is always there. He's a good looking man and I know that one day when I'm in a moomoo and eating bon bons, it is going to cross my mind in fear that he is following in the path of my some of my friends husbands. Its a fear that is ingrained in me that has nothing to do with my FH. I won't be able to change him once he get married, he has made that abundantly clear  but what I'm hoping is going to happen is that we are going to change together. I would like him to work on xyz if I make a solid effort to work on abc. Supposedly, thats what they tell me marriage is about (although, I like the "womens" rules a lot better where we always win) You sound like an extremely intuitive woman who knows what she wants, and I think it was really great that you talked to him about it beforehand. Now he can never say he "never knew."
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Posted 2/13/05 10:05 AM
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lolita4life
me and my loves
Member since 9/04 5543 total posts
Wedding Date:
3/1/2005 4:30 PM
Wed. Location:
Las Vegas
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Re: Cold Feet
thanks girls! its not that i want to CHANGE him, persay...
i dont want to go too into it, its pretty presonal and i dont want ppl thinking badly of him.
lets just say... he has a "temper" ok? that comes out sometimes and he cant 'control' himself.
ok i love him, but i dont ever want to be put in a situation where i feel vulnerable, or helpless physically, if yu catch my drift. (and dont worry girls he doesnt beat me!)
and as for the other reason, its nothign i want him to change.. its somthing i want him to keep his word on. something he does (or used to do) that hurts me and makes me feel insecure about myself. i basically want him to keep his promises and i should be able to trust him 110%.
hope this clarifies a bit.... its not that i really want to CHANGE him. i accept him for who he is. but not if it puts ME at any risk or harm or hurts me/my feelings.
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Posted 2/13/05 10:45 AM
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