Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

One of the checks we received as a gift bounced. The guest who gave it to us never said a thing and we just didn't feel right saying anything and wanted to just let it go unless they brought it up. It's been almost 2 months.

My question what do I write in the thank you?

I'm guessing that....

"We are so glad that you cold join us to celebrate the beginning our life together. We hope you had as much fun as we did. Thank you for the $10.00 bank charge.
Love,
Bob & Patti"

...won't really be appropriate. Should I just thank them for coming?

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

to the bounced check
to your ty wording!

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

why not write a nice thank you? And, include the actual check!!!

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

That is so wrong! Plus, they know they bounced it because their bank would have charged them a fee for a bounced check as well. If you got the check back, I would go to their bank and see if you can cash it. That way, you will know whether or not it will bounce without a charge!

That is so wrong!

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

I had the exact same thing happen to me.
I never did anything about it either.

I just am writing thank your for the gift and for being there for us on our special day.

I didn't want to make a big deal out of it but it definitely was wrong of them.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

funny wording

we had it too...we did not send a TY to the person and they apologized for it happeneing two months after the wedding. Of course our bank charged us $15 for it too.

Message edited 2/1/2005 2:04:21 PM.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

I would just send a regular thank you, as if the check didn't bounce.

There is a possibility that they didn't expect that to happen and are completely mortified.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

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Posted by TwoBugs

I would just send a regular thank you, as if the check didn't bounce.

There is a possibility that they didn't expect that to happen and are completely mortified.

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Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

I felt the same way. I don't believe it was done on purpose at all. That is why I just sent a thank you.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

If you are close to the person, I would mention it. Some people don't pay attention to their statements or balance their check books and may not realize the check bounced.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

I would try to deposit it again. Sometimes people don't realize how much is in their account until they overdraw it.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

We received a check that was such a mess, my bank wouldn't even accept it. I don't plan on thanking them for the gift on the TY. Luckily, we didn't incur a bank charge.

We'll thank them for coming and celebrating our day. I'm not going to thank them for a gift I did not receive.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

i agree if it is someone you are close to i would mention it - and the related charge
if it isnt then just thank them for comming and include the origional bounced check in the card just for their records.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

Can someone explain to me why a person would feel the need to NOT thank someone who clearly attempted to give a gift? I have a hard time believing that the giver purposely screwed up the check so that the bride was unable to cash it. So if it was by accident, why would you not thank them???? This makes no sense to me.

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Message edited 6/5/2007 7:29:37 PM.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

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Posted by suven

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Posted by am470

Can someone explain to me why a person would feel the need to NOT thank someone who clearly attempted to give a gift? I have a hard time believing that the giver purposely screwed up the check so that the bride was unable to cash it. So if it was by accident, why would you not thank them???? This makes no sense to me.

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To me, the issue is not that the check bounced, but that after the gift giver clearly found out that it bounced, they made NO effort to make it right. I'm not even saying to give a new gift, but at least give the bride back the money she was charged on the bounced check fee.

My MIL actually bounced a gift check at a wedding. And, as soon as she found out, she brought the cash, plus an extra $50 to the bride and groom to make up for it. She did it so fast that the bride and groom hadn't even found out yet about the check.

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Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

They aren't a close relative, someone I see a few times a year - more often lately. I basically do not want to make them feel uncomfortable and we aren't mad at them. I think I'll try to word it so it sounds like I could be thanking for the gift or for coming but neither specifically.

Not sure if it's just my bank but we didn't get the check back.

Thansk for all the input.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

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Posted by am470



Isn't a more likely explanation that the giver did not realize that was the check that bounced or not cashed???? Do you really think that the majority of guests would avoid giving the gift again??? Personally, I do not balance my checkbook or mark down the numbers of the checks that I write. If I bounced a check, the bank would inform me, and I would have no idea what check it was. I just think that you are assuming the worse in people and ignoring the more likely (and more harmless) explanation.

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Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

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Posted by suven

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Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

I would just say thank you for sharing in our special day. Id rather get nothing then a bounced check.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

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Posted by am470

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Posted by suven

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Well, I could be assuming the worst, I'll admit that. I don't think it's likely that a person would bounce a check, but not know which check bounced. Isn't that dangerous? What if the check for the mortgage were to bounce? I think that people should be responsible enough to find out which check bounced and make it right with the person. Even putting aside the 'moral' factor, a check is a legal promise to pay. A person can be sued for writing a bad check. JMHO

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Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

no, I didn't mean they could sue for a gift, but a check is a legal promise to pay. People sue and get sued every day over bounced checks.

edited add: I never said anything about getting arrested for bouncing a check.

But, just as an FYI, when I received a bounced check from someone who owed me money, I was told by the police department that the person COULD be arrested for bouncing too many checks.

Message edited 2/1/2005 5:53:47 PM.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

I would thank them for the gift. Who cares? they were invited guests, so you must have a relationship with them, give them the benefit of the doubt. To me, if I recieved a ton of gifts that night, one bad check is not a big deal, on the other side, imagine how your guests feel knowing that their gift bounced? That is humiliating.

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

Seriously it is not like they did a "dine and dash" they were guests, your guests...I would never make anyone feel uncomfortable over money. It is not like they are hoarding a ton of it and did not want to share, the check bounced

Re: Bounced Gift Check Thank you???

my cousin actually did that to me and i waited a few weeks and then redeposited it and it went through, so i just sent the thank u and didn't bring it up. i'm sure they feel stupid as it is. a friend had it happen though, a family of five all bounced three separate checks and never said a word. my friend mentioned it and they pretty much ignored her. three years later they still haven't really acknowledged it so u never know.