I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

Did you/do you send a TY to someone who came to your wedding and didn't give you a gift? NOT EVEN A CARD????

Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

We had two guests not give us anything.

One was a BM and I sent her a TY thanking her for being part of our day and for traveling to NY for the wedding (she lives out of state).

The other was a friend of DH that is known to be a cheapskate. He rsvp'd with no guest, then called two weeks before the wedding and asked if he could bring one, I added a guest and paid for her and he showed up alone!! And didn't give a gift or card. Needless to say - he didn't get a TY card!

Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

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Posted by SeptemberBride03

We had two guests not give us anything.

One was a BM and I sent her a TY thanking her for being part of our day and for traveling to NY for the wedding (she lives out of state).

The other was a friend of DH that is known to be a cheapskate. He rsvp'd with no guest, then called two weeks before the wedding and asked if he could bring one, I added a guest and paid for her and he showed up alone!! And didn't give a gift or card. Needless to say - he didn't get a TY card!

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Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

The other was a friend of DH that is known to be a cheapskate. He rsvp'd with no guest, then called two weeks before the wedding and asked if he could bring one, I added a guest and paid for her and he showed up alone!! And didn't give a gift or card. Needless to say - he didn't get a TY card!

Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

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Posted by halloweenbride04

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Posted by SeptemberBride03

What should I write? "Thank you for coming to our wedding and eating a drinking for free and not caring enough about us to spend $1.00 and 2 minutes to get us a wedding card....we hope you had fun."!!!!

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HEEHEEHEE... Why not - I may have to steal that line!

Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

We are doing thank yous now too.

I have 1 friend that didn't give anything she says she is making us something eventually, but I am not counting on it.

I just wrote a thank you for coming message.

DH's uncle also bought us a bonzai tree that he is holding onto untill we get a house. . . .

I don't know what to do there. . .
he really should have gotten us a card-- I only heard about this plant from my MIL.

Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

One of my MIL's friends showed with her boyfriend and didn't give a card or anything. I wrote, "Thank you for celebrating our wedding day with us. We hope you enjoyed yourselves." I am hoping she will get the hint--they do have a full year to send a gift!

Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

I'm still trying to figure out what to do in this situation.

I don't care about gifts, period. And since about 75% of our guests were OOT, many people traveled a long way to be with us.

So I'm torn: of course I want to thank people for attending, but doesn't it seem a little like fishing for a gift?

Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

This is my feelings on the matter.

I would never give a thank you to someone who shows up to a party that i am having. I only send out thank you's when i receive a gift from them.

We had about 10 people (YES 10) that did not even so much as give us a card (and trust me most of these people are very well off individuals). And not only that but keep mentioning to my DH that they are going to get us a gift....ho hum. I did not send any of them a card to thank them for coming to my wedding. The free food, drink, music and favor was my thank you to coming to a party.

As for people who are thinking that by sending them a thank you this will make the person remember they did not give you a gift don't even bother. That never really happens. These people know very well that they did not give you a gift.

Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

I try not to let the bad behavior of others dictate what I do. I sent thank you notes to everyone who attended the wedding or who sent a gift, including the few who attended and did not give a gift.

I simply wrote something like, "thank you for coming and sharing the day with us." The gifts really weren't the reason I invited these people to my wedding and I did appreciate that they came, gift or not.

Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

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Posted by dpli

I try not to let the bad behavior of others dictate what I do. I sent thank you notes to everyone who attended the wedding or who sent a gift, including the few who attended and did not give a gift.

I simply wrote something like, "thank you for coming and sharing the day with us." The gifts really weren't the reason I invited these people to my wedding and I did appreciate that they came, gift or not.

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Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

I had another thought about this just now when I saw that bounced check post......we had a few cards go missing at the reception. DH's cousin emailed him when she was trying to balance her checkbook and asked him if we had already cashed the check. Our reaction was "what check???" That is how we found out that they did bring a gift and we never got it (they just put the envelopes on the gift table instead of handing them to us.) I think if this happens, and you send a thank you, without mentioning the gift, and their check doesn't clear, they might realize that you didn't get it......

Message edited 2/1/2005 3:05:47 PM.

Re: I know this has probably been asked...thank you question

hi hon -
well this is what we decided to to as far as that - if it is someone you want to have a photo of you two who didnt or couldnt bring a gift then send them a card - say thanks for comming or we missed having you there or whatever - if it is someone who was not close to you then dont worry about it - dont bother sending them anything cause they wont appreciate it anyway
jmo