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Bearhug117
Wedding Newbie
Member since 1/05 7 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/18/2005 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
New Hyde Park Inn
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Dont know what to do about BM??
I asked my friend of 15 years to be my BM and ever since I did we have been fighting about the most stupid things she doesnt seem interested in my wedding and Im wondering if I should kick her out of my BP does anyone feel this way about any of there BM if so help!!
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Posted 1/20/05 3:44 PM 
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May05Bride
Hawaii is AWESOME!
Member since 10/03 4006 total posts
Wedding Date:
5/29/2005 7:30 PM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
do that only if you are ready to forever loose her as a friend. If not, I would just keep her in, but not ask her to do ANYTHING!
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Posted 1/20/05 3:48 PM
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Bunnymonkey
Feels like home to me...
Member since 6/04 4861 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/11/2005 5:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Raphael Vineyards
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
Petty fights usually mean there is something else wrong.
I would take the mature adult route on this one and ask her, honestly and openly "is everything okay? Things seem tense with us." If she is not willing to open up at all, maybe the friendship is over. At that point I would evaluate her place in the bridal party. But not before you attempt to dig into the root of the problem. If you want to keep her as a friend, I would advise trying to talk first!
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Posted 1/20/05 4:34 PM
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Mushpot
Board Fanatic
Member since 1/05 375 total posts
Wedding Date:
3/13/2005 5:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Giorgio's
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
Posted by Bearhug117
I asked my friend of 15 years to be my BM and ever since I did we have been fighting about the most stupid things she doesnt seem interested in my wedding and Im wondering if I should kick her out of my BP does anyone feel this way about any of there BM if so help!!
I just went through this problem with my best friend since 7th grade. She said yes, and everything was fine. All of a sudden, now she suddenly can't do it, and hasn't really given me an explanation at all. I am getting married in 51 days. Only, my best friend was my MoH, so I had to bump up a bm to MoH. Just remember it's your day, and youre memories. I would ask her if she's really serious about it, if not, then tell her you'd like to ask someone else, or not have her in it if she's not going to give it her all. Good luck!! 
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Posted 1/20/05 5:03 PM
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VS11
Live..Love..Laugh
Member since 1/05 3245 total posts
Wedding Date:
1/1/2012 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
= - )
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
Message edited 5/9/2006 8:01:44 PM.
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Posted 1/20/05 5:58 PM
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junebride!
We're married!!!!
Member since 9/04 1085 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/26/2005 3:15 PM
Wed. Location:
I LOVE the NRC!!!!
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
I'd probably wait a bit longer and see how the relationship goes...IMO it's better to ask late than to regret asking!
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Posted 1/20/05 7:08 PM
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angelbear217
Come out baby girl!!!!
Member since 12/03 3779 total posts
Wedding Date:
7/23/2005 12:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Inn at East Wind
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
I would definitely sit her down for a mature adult talk woman to woman. She might have other things going on in her life that are preventing her from being there for you 100%. Before you do anything, talk to her.
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Posted 1/20/05 7:14 PM
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dm24angel
Take a full moon and add Wine!
Member since 2/04 8534 total posts
Wedding Date:
3/11/2005 5:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Water Mill
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
My BP has been a revolving Door...LOL
One backed out due to "no time", then another had issues with time, I finally had to agree the BM position was not for her, and my best friend for 18 years just scrwed me royally and I replaced her.
In the END, I found my true friends...Wait it out a little, talk to her about it and if you must, dont feel bad about decisions, the last thing you need is more stress by people who are suppossed to be there to help you!
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Posted 1/20/05 8:00 PM
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micmar
"I'm Addicted"
Member since 12/04 1497 total posts
Wedding Date:
9/24/2005 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Timber Point Country Club
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
I think you should be honest also - I wouldn't just kick her out without finding out if there's something upsetting her; it's your day, it should be about YOU & as your bm she should understand that.
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Posted 1/20/05 8:11 PM
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VS11
Live..Love..Laugh
Member since 1/05 3245 total posts
Wedding Date:
1/1/2012 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
= - )
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
I
Message edited 5/9/2006 8:01:24 PM.
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Posted 1/20/05 8:12 PM
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VS11
Live..Love..Laugh
Member since 1/05 3245 total posts
Wedding Date:
1/1/2012 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
= - )
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
Message edited 5/9/2006 8:01:15 PM.
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Posted 1/20/05 8:13 PM
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LuckyMe
Some day over the rainbow!
Member since 5/04 2496 total posts
Wedding Date:
6/1/2008 6:30 PM
Wed. Location:
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
I know I have my own room so excuse me for snooping
I had the same problem. My MOH stopped calling me and returning my calls finally we had a blow out over email because she wouldn't pick up the phone. Needless to say Im hurt and we aren't friends anymore but my sister who is my favorite person in the world and if it wasn't for my ex-bestfriend assuming she was my MOH my sister wouldve been asked from the beginning, has agreed to do it. So Im happy again
oh yeah we were friends for 10yrs. and she is godmother to my four kids.
Message edited 1/20/2005 8:19:06 PM.
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Posted 1/20/05 8:18 PM
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VS11
Live..Love..Laugh
Member since 1/05 3245 total posts
Wedding Date:
1/1/2012 12:00 AM
Wed. Location:
= - )
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
Message edited 5/9/2006 8:08:48 PM.
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Posted 1/20/05 8:37 PM
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traceyd
2 yrs!!!!!!!!
Member since 11/04 2180 total posts
Wedding Date:
11/4/2005 3:00 PM
Wed. Location:
Estate at East Wind
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
Posted by rosaria
my problem is my best friend of 7 years..we were inseperable,,and the past year we drifted..she was more like my sister than anything else...she started going with this guy and had no time for me anymore.i didnt get on her case about it,,but it did hurt.
when i got engaged we werent really on talking terms,,so it was kind of weird calling her to tell her... of course she was excited for me and we did start talking and seeing each other more often....but that didnt last to long..now we speak maybe 2 x's a week..and I havent asked her to be in my wedding party yet..but i thnk she kinda expects it...i always thouht she would be in it also,,but after this past year i feel that i would be doing it just because.......
any advise?
If you are hesitant than I think there is a good reason for that and I wouldn't unless the situation changes-you dont want to ask her and then wind up not speaking with her at all and have to deal with the fact you already asked her-its very awkward to have to UN ask someone to be in your wedding party..but that is JMO-good luck and follow your heart
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Posted 1/20/05 9:07 PM
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randella
I'm somebody's wife???
Member since 8/04 4685 total posts
Wedding Date:
4/16/2005 7:00 PM
Wed. Location:
The Carltun
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Re: Dont know what to do about BM??
I would make a final decision before you look/buy dresses.. I have a BM who I would have kicked out- she is so uninterested it is insane. I thought buying the dress and shopping for it would get her more excited-- uh, no. If she did not pay for the dress in full- she would have been booted! That is, if I had the ball$ to do it!!
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Posted 1/20/05 9:07 PM
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