sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Two very long years my MIL has put up a Mighty fight against Cancer.

One year ago this weekend she was still battling, but danced like she was seventeen at our wedding. Sadly enough, last night she was admitted to St. Catherines of Siena (the hospice center inside) for what the Dr.'s and nurses are calling "her last couple of days".

My DH is strong, and doing very well with this all. His mother raised him and his brothers in a very christian household.... And he knows that she's "going home to Jesus".

I love my MIL like a mother... We have a very close relationship, and I am NOT handling this well at all. The way I was raised is to be strong for my DH, and be his support... and I feel like I am doing a $h!tty job, because all I am doing is crying like a 3 year old who lost his blankey....

I know she will be "in a better place" and "won't be suffering any longer" but it is so hard, watching this very vibrant woman leave before my very eyes. The toughest part is last night, before the ambulette picked her up, I took alex there to say his "goodbye"--- It was so sad.

I held him and told him to give grandma a kiss and tell her he loves her very much and he kissed my MIL and gave her a big hug. And then she asked for another one. I almost lost it.. I had to leave immediately with him, and just sank to my knees at her driveway sobbing and holding Alex....

I have gone through many losses throughout my life, and just started to have faith in a "god" again. And now I am back at square one, so f-ing pissed off... at god, at life, at this whole friggen situation... I wish I could just pull it together already.. and I just really need some hugs.....

Thanks in advance.......

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

I am SO sorry for what you are going through.

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Lauren...I am so sorry that your family is going through this hard time right now. You and your family are in my prayers.

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

so sorry to hear this

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

You and your family will be in my thoughts...

Mish

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

I just went throuh this with FH grandmother. Its the hardest thing to do. The first time I saw her I lost it. I'm suppose to comfort him, he was comforting me. FM if you need to

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

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Posted by Boop2704

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Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Oh, this is so terrible You, your family and MIL will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Message edited 10/9/2004 11:56:37 PM.

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

You and your family are in my prayers

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Wishing you all peace

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Hey pumpkin, I know the next few days are going to be rocky ones but remember you are not going through it alone. I feel your pain just from a different angle. I love my aunt soooooooo dearly and this kills me inside as well. I am always here no matter what the problem or time of day. I hope you know that. Over the last four years you and I have become so close, you have become an active and loved part of my family. I know you are a cousin to me by way of the family tree but know I love you like a sister. You have been there to hold my head us time and time and tome again and I thank you for that from the bottom of my heart. No matter what happened you were always there, when I went through almost loosing Amy, Jesse's surgery, loosing popo and so on. Know that I am here to return the favor. There is always a flowered wine glass with your name on it and a friend to talk to on 80 palm rd. I love you sweetheart, try to enjoy your anniversary. Call me if you need me. Love Sassy.

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

I lost my Mom 10 years ago and my dad 3 years ago. It is not easy. I am so sorry for what you are going thru. here are some hugs.

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

I'm so sorry.

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

I am so sorry.

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

I almost started crying when I read that so I can't imagine how awful this must be for you. I am so sorry.

Re: sad... need hugs and prayers for MIL.. long vent

Well, I know you don't want to hear anymore stuff like this, but it's times like this that can actually test your faith and bring you closer to god. I'm praying for your MIL and your entire family. If she's dying peacefully and knows she's going to a better place, then there's nothing more you can ask for. A few minutes,a few hours, days, or years more, maybe, but it's all up to god. Keep trying t be strong, but it's ok to vry, too. DH seems to have a lot of strength about this, and maybe even though it's his mom, he'll have to be strong for you, too..and that's ok..

try to have a happy anniversary. I know it's a really rough way to spend it, but you have to think of it in terms of celebrating life. You and DH have made quite an accomplishment, you've made it through your first year of marriage (usually the toughest, they say), and you should be congratulated, and find some tiny place in your heart for rejoicing, even in such a painful time.

I hope this didn't come across as all hollow words, as I know words cna be at a time like this. I really am praying that everything works out for you. Try to keep positive about your MIL. If she is at peace, then that's wonderful, and maybe there is some small comfort and joy in that to be found. Best Wishes. Keep praying, keep the faith, and give DH a big kiss. it IS your anniversary