BTDT moms: Dumb question.

I was just wondering, how long after delivery before they start letting your guests in? I just worry that the families are going to want to come in right away and I want to make sure that me and DH have a little time to hold our baby and enjoy that time together first before everyone comes rushing in.

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

With Sean - he was home 3 days. With baby #2, we'll be home 3 weeks before anyone gets in!!!! LOL

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

I think it depends on the hospital but most will honor your wishes. I just had my parents and my inlaws in right after the deliveries then other family and friends later on. If you want to keep it private then tell the hospital as well as your parents, etc. so noone has their feelings hurt.

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

Our families live very close by and they are so anxious for the baby to arrive. I know they are excited but I am afraid everyone is going to come in the room before me and DH get to hold the baby for a little while first. I am looking forward to our bonding time with the baby first.
I don't want everyone holding the baby when me and DH didn't get to, ya know?

Message edited 1/18/2004 9:56:26 PM.

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

Sue ... certainly not a dumb question. I would make it known to the hospital staff what you want to happen beforehand. The staff should respect your wishes.

Our entire family was waiting in the loby while I was in labor. After Maria was born, they were allowed into our suite (which I wanted) & we all waited for Maria to be brought in from the nursery. While it was a little crazy there for about an hour while everyone fussed & tooks pics (which made me NUTS!!!! ) .... Everyone left knowing that we wanted our time together as a new family. Vinnie stayed with me for a little while & then went home to finally rest. I had my time with Maria later on in the quiet of the night, an hour I'll never forget for the rest of my life.

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

If you are talking about the family coming into the LDR room, then there is no time limit. You do not have to allow anyone in. A few hours after you have the baby you will be moved into another room. Visitors will be allowed during the posted hours which may be immediately or not until the next day, depending on the time you have the baby. I told my family that I did not think I wanted anyone waiting at the hospital while I was in labor. We called them after I delivered and told them they could visit that night. We were very clear that we only wanted our parents and sibling that night- no friends. It was important to us for the family to have quality time with us/baby and if friends were in the waiting rm., then they would feel rushed to leave and let the next group in. I had the baby at 3PM and visiting hours were a few hours later. I also made it clear to the nurses in LDR that I was not expecting anyone so to notify me first if someone showed up. I do not think any feelings were hurt since no one complained. Do what you are comfortable with.

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

I understand that our families will be waiting in the waiting room. I just wanted to make sure that you don't have the baby and then the minute they bring the baby to us, our families get called in & are all passing him/her around before we had our little time together first.
I just want me and my husband get to have our precious time enjoying our new little baby and our excitement together before the mad rush comes in.

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

That's a good question... I never even thought about that!

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

Sue it may be hard but you can say you don't want anyone to hold him. I didn't let anyone hold him until the next day. I had a party in my room I had a private room so it was quite crowded. I just let everyone know that only Mommy and Daddy would be holding him at first

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

Sue, youd be surprised at how STRICT hospitals have gotten with newborns (a GOOD thing for us mommies!)
If youre delivering at one of the CHS hospitals (Catholic), during some of the visiting hours, the baby is not even allowed out of the nursery (cant be in the room with the guests!) So that can be good and bad. In a way I didnt mind so much because of that reason, so that everyone wouldnt be fussing and hovering over him.
Immediate family was always allowed to have the baby in the room.

Im sure there's time for bonding and just resting after the baby is born.

Call your hospital and ask them how things are done, whether its a natural birth or c-section, so that youre prepared for either scenario. and then ask who you can speak to regarding your requests.

They should most likely do whatever you wish. At a time like that, anything YOU say goes!

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

I delivered at Winthrop, and they leave it up to the parents to decide if you want anyone to see you and the baby immediately after birth. About an hour and a half after Nicolas was born, I allowed my parents in to my L&D suite and they held him.

No one else held him until he came home from the hospital.

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

I don't mind the grandparents holding the baby. I just want to make sure me and hubby have our little time together to enjoy our baby by ourselves before the families come in.
I don't want to give birth and then have everyone holding the baby shortly after before me and hubby have our time and get to hold the baby ourselves for a little while, thats all.

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

And I forgot people will want to snap pictures.
I'm not sure I want anyone snapping any pictures of me shortly after I deliver the baby.
I'm sure I will look a little scary.

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

You will look beautiful.


When I look at the pics of me after I gave birth I look tired but I have never looked more content and happy

Message edited 1/20/2004 3:46:04 PM.

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

Thanks Stacey but I already feel like my face gained a bunch of the weight along with my belly. Not feeling so beautiful already so I don't even want to imagine what I will look like after giving birth. The heck with the make-up kit, I think I will need a magic kit.

Thankfully my DH thinks I look beautiful and tells me all the time even though I don't feel like I am.

Message edited 1/20/2004 3:50:30 PM.

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

I am telling you to take a couple pictures even if no one but yourself looks at them. You will be glad you did. Trust me

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

Stacy's right, Sue. There are a few pics of me right after that I'm don't show anyone, but I'm glad I have. When I'm ready to show Maria ... she'll have an idea of what it was really like the day she was born! Even though you may be a little self concious & camera shy given what you've just gone through ... there will not be another opportunity to capture the reality of that moment.

also .. I did not let anyone else hold the baby the first night. Everyone understands. And if they don't ... so what? It's your baby & you get to decide how you want to do it!

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

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Posted by Stacey1403

I am telling you to take a couple pictures even if no one but yourself looks at them. You will be glad you did. Trust me

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Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

Same with us, Deb! OF all the pics I have, there are hardly any of Maria & me ... tons of her with Vinnie. I guess b/c I'm always taking them ... but I'm also going to make a point to be in front of the camera more!

Re: BTDT moms: Dumb question.

i don't have my own experience, but my cousin just delivered on 12/10. Emma Rose was born at 3:30pm. visiting hours began at 6:30pm and there were a TON of people in my cousin's room. my cousin seemed up for it, but honestly, she had just given birth literally 3 hours before. Emma was in the infant warmer in the nursery until 7:45 having her stats monitored. at that point, they rolled her out and brought her to my cousin's room. my cousin and her husband did not get any one-on-one time with the baby until visiting hours ended at 8pm (more liked 8:30 with my family). from 7:45 until we left, the baby got passed around quite a bit. again - i don't know if this bothered my cousin or not - she hasn't mentioned it if it did.

if you think this would bother you, then you should definitely speak up. i'm sure the nurses could "lie" to your family about you being ready to accept visitors so that you and DH can have some time to yourselves.

good luck!!!!!